Emotional Whiplash - Pete Wilson

Great post to read! This particular post is about two families; both experiencing joys of having a baby but the outcome is so different for each of them post delivery. Regardless of the circumstance in this post, the statements he makes can be applied to us at any given point(s) in our life. http://withoutwax.tv/2010/05/21/emotional-whiplash/

Pete says “Isn’t it amazing how in a moment like that you so desperately want God near, but at the same time you also feel secretly mad at Him?” Do you know how many times I desperately want to feel His presence but yet too angry to care where he was (even though I knew he was there) These words resonate to the deepest of my bones right now for some reason. Granite, I haven’t had the heartfelt and overwhelming pain of giving birth and losing a child within minutes of their precious life. But through a miscarriage I experienced a loss I wasn’t quite ready for. And for someone who so desperately wants to be a mom and to experience the joys of motherhood I thought that God was being cruel to me the day it happened. I don't feel truer words have been spoken then when Pete said that the Christian reality is often more full with questions than answers. I believe that is because we know God’s heart, we know what he wants for his people – yet sometimes the approach He takes is unconventional in our eyes. Not quite sure why this post just hit me the way it did; but it took the sour mood I was in and turned it somber. Maybe one reason it hits is given the appointments I have today to start my weight loss plan in order to work towards the goal of having a baby. And I think right now I'm scared/worried because I don't know what the outcome is going to be. I know what I want it to be - but does God want the same thing. Oh how I pray he does; but I stay guarded in case it's not. So for me today - I have more questions than answers yet I hold onto faith. Believing my faith will prevail over the doubt that is currently filling my head....

Was this mean of me?

PW photo assignment this week is about happiness. Even though my pictures don't come close to the ones posted - I couldn't help but laugh as I posted this one. I keep telling Megan if she leaves photos on my computer or camera I will use them against her... hahahaha

First Time for Everything

I apparently have quite a few stories I started writing and never finished/posted and as I read through them it was a probably a good thing. Boring and lame is how I would describe them... but that could probably describe half the things I talk about.

Then I came across this title and headed over to read it but the post was blank..... and I have no idea what I was going to write about. Other than I guess there is a first time for everything - the date is in March which technically wasn't that long ago. So why post this boring piece now you ask, to prove how boring and lame I am I guess.

Dear Dell,

Your support line sucks. Your employees and/or computer system is not efficient and why is it when I'm transferred to another person they ask me the same information over again, name/email address/company name. Why is that information not in a case already for others to see. Oh and the best part - I get put on hold but funny I don't think a DIAL tone should be associated with the hold button.

Attack of the Killer Soup

I know I shouldn't laugh but every time I think about this I do. This past weekend was supposed to be a weekend full of fun and it ended up not being that way. From the prior post you all know I had wardrobe issues from the events I was to be attending. Well turns out the only event I actually attended was Debra's graduation where I got sick. My throat started hurting and I felt as though it was closing up. So after her graduation my brother in law took me up to the Gate Station for some Advil and throat losengers and of course a coke icee. I started feeling a little better but then at 3:00 AM I was abruptly woken by a very sore throat and not being able to swallow. I got up and found a flash light to look in my throat and there it was a big white gross spot on the back of my throat.

I won't tell you the words that soon followed after seeing that not so pretty picture of my throat. Hey it was late/early, whatever, and I knew that meant I was going to be out of commission for what was supposed to be a fun weekend. I tossed/turned for the rest of the morning until I woke up at 7:30 and decided to throw on some clothes and head up to Solantic that opened at 8 AM. Apparently I wasn't the only one in need of Solantic, there were 6 of us in the waiting room by 8:10 AM. Even though I was number 3 in line it still took over an hour an half for a doctor to look at me and write out my prescription.

Here's my favorite line of the morning, from the doctor "well the good news is it's not strep".... Well if that's good news - what's the bad news me - oh yeah the bad news is you are not a good doctor! I have a fever, the chills, and a rather large white bump on the back of my throat. All indications point to strep because I don't just get random white bumps on the back of my throat. I hate to tell you but the 10 minute strep test you ran on me is wrong and I bet if you sent it off for an overnight culture it would tell a different story. But who am I to tell you how to do your job. Can you tell the bitterness was kicking in yet? I was not a happy camper after sitting in this small exam room freezing, I had the chills, I couldn't swallow and I waited on him for 1 hr and 15 min to tell me his 'good' news. So he prescribed me a Z-pack because it was clear I had something angry in my body (ya think) and a prescription for what he called Magic Mouth wash - which by the way is NOT very magic. It was supposed to numb my throat and help with the swelling which it did not. I had better luck with Chloraseptic throat spray.

Needless to say Michael wasn't happy about me missing the wedding. Something dumb came out of his mouth about how I should have come home earlier Friday night and taken Nyquil because then I wouldn't have gotten strep. Did ya'll know Nyquil scared off strep? Guess I learn something new everyday.

Anyway - so to the funny part of this whole thing is how justice sometimes comes in places you don't expect. Re read paragraph above about how someone was mad at me for missing his friends wedding. Well that night he did return in a more pleasant mood and I asked him to heat up some soup for me because I hadn't eaten all day. So he did heat up some chicken noodle for me. And while I was eating he started heating up his own baked potato soup. He had covered it with a paper towel so it wouldn't splatter in the microwave but when he removed the paper towel and went to stir his up it popped and a hot glob of it hit him right in the eye. To which he dropped like a sack of potatoes (no pun intended) to the kitchen floor and dropping his spoon with him. Well both dogs went running but I found them more interested in his spoon and the bits of soup that had jumped out of the bowl and onto the ground and on him. Ya'll I tried not to laugh at him rolling around saying his eyeball was on fire and he had 3rd degree burns. But I couldn't stop myself. But it hurt to laugh too... but I just couldn't stop. It was about the funniest thing I had seen all day. Even more ironic - the rest of the soup was COLD!! So he had to continue heating it up which made him a little head shy so he used the microwave door as his shield.

Morale of the story - don't get mad at your sick wife!

Be Still My Booting Heart

My favorite seasons are fall/winter. I love how the trees change colors (well in other states since they don't really change in FL), I love how people start decorating for fall and Christmas, lights, music, and mostly people are in good moods.

But the thing I love most about winter is being able to cover up. I love wearing my sweaters, coats, long sleeve shirts and my boots. I especially love the boots - cowboy, dress up, funky, traditional. They have some pretty sassy ones out right now and some crazy expensive ones too. I love the cowboy boots they have out now and some that are trying to look cowboy like but aren't really. They are just so much more fun than the flip flops I spent 98% of my life in from March - November.

We have a busy weekend ahead of us with Debra's graduation from PT school with her doctorate nonetheless, (hello Dr. DDT), friends wedding, a concert, and a Christmas dinner with the whole family. Well me in all my smartness has decided that I want a pair of shin or knee high boots. AND I have been planning my weekend outfits around these boots that I didn't own yet. Mission # 1 - find the boots and preferably ones that don't cost $150. Mission # 2 - find the outfit to go with the boots.

I decided on a pair of brown boots for some reason. I had to have brown and I wanted a funky brown skirt or dress to go with it. Most everything I own in my closet goes with black - so naturally I want something opposite of what I have. Then when it's hard to find I want to complain about why I hate shopping. But I torture myself half the time with being so difficult - so I am my own worst enemy.

Problem # 1 - finding knee high boots that fit my calves. I have big calves from all the working out I do. You know all that walking from the couch to the kitchen really builds up the old calf muscles (or as Debra knows it, the gastrocnemius muscle). Or maybe it's because I spend so much time in the kitchen that I have big calves... and a big...... well we won't go there. Well Belk came through for me; I found a pair of brown boots that were a little rugged but I can also dress up.

Problem # 2 - finding a brown skirt or dress to go below my knees to go with the boots I now own. Well apparently brown is a fall color and not a winter color - who knew. Oh and who also knew they were putting out spring colors in December. Guess I'll know for next year to start looking in May for a fall colored skirt since clothing companies apparently don't abide by the season we are in. Just when I was about to give up bingo - found one on the internet that matched my criteria. It arrived several days later, I tried it on as soon as I got it, and just as quickly put it back in the bag it came in and returned it. Three weeks later and I still don't have a brown skirt to show. Next plan - buy a pair of brown dress pants (if they even make them anymore) and I'll just wear my boots under them. No one will see them but I'll know I have them on.

Please keep in mind this outfit I'm searching for is only for Debra's graduation on Friday. I haven't even gotten to Saturday's wedding outfit which will also be worn Saturday night to the concert.

Problem # 1 - now I need to find a pair of black knee high boots and something to go with it... Loooooooong drama story short - I found the pair of boots I needed at Belk again (thank you Belk for bailing me out again - guess it's my checkbooks turn to bail you out). They are pull on boots (instead of zipper) but the leather is a stretchy material so it fits my very in shape calves... and that shape would be round.

Problem # 2 - finding an outfit to match the boots. Is anyone else seeing a pattern here? I know I am and it's making me dizzy. Found a cute dress at the store, thought maybe if I bring it home and put on some Spanx with it - it'd help. That was my first mistake.....well maybe buying the dress was the first mistake and thinking was the second mistake. It was one of those - looks okay but not totally crazy but it sure looked cute with those boots. End result - took it back the next day. Let's see if you have been paying attention at all....... what do you think I ended up with instead as my wedding outfit..... The answer is YES another pair of dress pants but in black. This body is just not made for dresses or skirts apparently. I so desperately want it to be but it's just not. So for now everything will just have to look cuter in the picture I have in my head than in person.

I half debated taking the boots back and just wearing the old worn out boots I own now. But then I figured if I did that - one day I will need them and I won't be able to find them because they'll stop making them or something.

Gotta love the pointed witches toe look and cockroach killing heal.

My half country/half biker/sassy boots. I like how they make me feel taller. I'll use all the height I can get since I'm vertically challenged.

One Word, Ten Syllables

YUMYUMYUMYUMYUMYUMYUMYUMYUMYUM!!!

http://thepioneerwoman.com/cooking/2008/02/apple_dumplings/

Oh Lawrd have mercy on my soul! These little things were so tasty and so easy to make. They melt in your mouth, kind of like M&M's, but only better. Debra and Robbie popped over on Saturday night unexpectedly (it's a good thing we had just put clothes back on) and brought us dinner. What better way to cap off dinner than to have dessert afterwards. And nothing is better than trying a new recipe on others; which I tend to do 99.9% of the time. Then I stress about it.....but that's not what today is about.

Today is about how divine these little apple dumplings are. The mountain dew just adds a sweetness to it, well that and the 3/4 cup of sugar I'm sure - but the MD just adds a good flavor to the sauce. I cut the recipe in half and only made 8 dumplings because I'm pretty sure my jeans wouldn't be able to handle having 16 of those little suckers in my house. The house smelled so good after baking the apples, but the taste that lingers in your mouth after eating one is like totally way better (says the valley girl).

I didn't use a Granny Smith apple though, I used a some type of red apple which I can't think of the name because there are only 20 choices when looking at red apples. Maybe it will say it on my Publix receipt.... which I apparently threw away. Oh well, I'm sure a Fuji or Red Delicious, or McIntosh will work.

Either way - if you haven't made this yet then you are missing out. I think it's even better than hmmmm..............Mrs. Smith Apple Crumb apple pie. Yeah that's it, it's better than the Mrs. Smith apple crumb pie... haha

Happy eating! And hopefully soon...